Funny/Surreal Part 1: Sitting in audience in a hall talking to Batman who is a really reasonable chap. Spiderman however is arrogant and is trying to out do Batman in giving gifts to the audience. I tell Batman that although Spiderman’s is bigger his is better. Part 2: Hammond and I are in a space ship strapped into our seats. This Human looking alien then walks in and turns on gravity machine and air pressure leveller so he can then remove the windows… which he does. Richard’s crying with fear and I’m enjoying myself. He then drops his hat out the hole where the window was and starts whining so I have to jump out and get it (we’re in the middle of the universe, no where near anything). At first I’m nervous about jumping then I see the Tardis and jump out without any worry.Part 3: Am at my “home” (actually a completely random house) talking to the tenth doctor and rose when the ninth doctor walks in. I have a panic about a potential paradox but they don’t seem worried. We have a conversation… I talk mainly to Chris.
Eerie Am admitted to hospital for no reason, I’m not ill but they keep me there for a night. Very surreal, everything is dismal and grey and I’m the only one there and yet I’m strangely happy. They then release me having done no tests and tell me I’m fine.
Eerie I’m standing on a water tower required to jump off and go through a tiny window then into the water below. The person behind me jumps and the guy standing there says “well, you did better than the doctor”. I look round and there’s David Tennant who then says “all we need now is for the tower to collapse and it’ll be just like always” then I’m under water, at first I’m frozen with fear and then I rise to the surface and all I can see is water for miles and I’m all alone. It’s dark and grey and there’s a gentle mist on the water.
Surreal I’m at CCHS with Juliet and it’s the first day back. We’ve spent the whole morning putting up displays then she has to go to class, everything is sombre and scary and the building is backwards. Then on the way home Emma D and I see a giant yellow suitcase which we realise is the 507. Terry (bus Driver) then drives round the corner in a replacement bus. Danbury’s empty and there are no ducks in the pond!
Realistic Jeremy Clarkson is the King of England and there is no government. I live with him in his castle and play piano for him, although I don’t play the piano at all in the dream as before I get to I know his floppy disk down the back of the piano which is the only copy of his new book. I thought he’d have me beheaded as he’s done that to people who have done much less and yet he just takes me into a room full of top gear magazines (100s of 1000s of them). And then something else may of happened which I don’t like to think about… it wasn’t graphic.
Surreal Part 1: Patrick Swayze is my father and was an actor, as was I. He’s having a party at grandma’s house… although in the dream it isn’t hers. Me and Juliet are there with him. He comes outside and tells us to go home as he’ll be hammered soon and then runs upstairs with this woman. I start shouting at him about how mum’s at home waiting and she has no idea and I’m going to tell her.Part 2: Jeremy Clarkson is put in charge of the economy of Britain and he gets rid of car tax and tobacco tax so everything has to be three times as expensive as it is now so everyone is really pissed off.
Realistic I’m being chased by a swarm of wasps that then all land on me. I can’t get stung though so I just flick them all off one by one.
Surreal Part 1: We’re in the lounge and the foundation of the house breaks so the house slides forward. We run into the dining room to straighten it out then go into the garden.Part 2: I’m at a boot fair surrounded by caravans. I’m bored out my mind.Part 3: I’m at a party and I’m talking to this guy who looks like Andrew Eiden (complete savages) who in the dream I fancy but in real life I don’t find at all attractive. We then go upstairs to fool around and while we’re fooling around he turns into a hedgehog and fell asleep on his back yet all I could think was “I thought hedgehogs slept on their fronts?”
Eerie I could drive the defender, then I tried to do a U turn to avoid a car that was trying to ram into me and so I blocked the road and Mum had a go at me because I didn’t have a license.
Funny A hamster and a rat are plotting world domination. Hamster tried to bite me when I go to put it in a shoebox with the rat. A ninja mouse with a light sabre then helped me and we saved the world. All animals were actual size.
Eerie Heather dies and I go to her funeral with Caitlin etc. I'm a complete zombie, I'm not crying but I'm not talking or responding. I'm just drifting. I then find myself in this room full of benches with all these people mourning over lots of different people who have died, and all the mourners are in pairs except for me who is sitting on this bench in front of her grave on my own when suddenly it hits me that she’s gone and I burst into tears. This is really weird because I’m never ever bothered when people die in my dreams for some reason, whoever they are.
Eerie/surreal This one comes in many parts: part 1: I'm on the phone to Hammond while I'm in Wales and he's absolutely distraught because his wife has left him. part 2: Have tea made from Dope with Faye Fullalove, Emma Davidson, Helena Davis and Jenna Birks while waiting for second call from Hammond part 3: am tweedle dum in a pantomime with Constance (bitch from scouts) as Cinderella (don't ask me how that works) and she's absolutely terrible and so I have to tell her how to play the role (which feels great as she's always going on about how well she can act.) part 4: at my cousins house, fifteen minutes early for a BBQ which I forgot was happening... panic about the fact that I have to go part 5: in the Tardis with Rose and the Doctor (10th) am sent into a cave with rose, we get trapped and we work our way out with the help of the doctor and Sarah Jane smith. In the style of an old Doctor who episode.
Surreal Now this is the weirdest one. Mr McMillan comes to my house during a really bad storm to ask me about what I'm doing for Jeremy Clarkson's birthday because he and I are good friends of Jeremy’s.
Surreal/Eerie I dreamt I’d learnt to drive the Citroen yet every time I used the accelerator pedal to get moving I went at about 80mph. and I was in first gear. I got told off by some old people reading the guardian.
Funny/Eerie There was a amphibious Lamborghini in an indoors dock and I was doing work experience for Hugh Laurie and he drove a fiesta into the water and then I had to save him from drowning... he seemed high... and I dreamt I fell in love with a curator at the British museum.
Realistic Ok… THIS is the weirdest one. Every school has been given an MP for the year and we had Boris Johnson who I always thought was a dude but in my dream he kept flirting with me and trying to touch me up. I had to go talk to him so we started chatting and then I asked him where the lined paper was and he said it was in the doctor who drawer... then he said he hated doctor who... then I was behind his desk looking for something and he trapped me by moving the desk up against the wall... so I escaped that then I was standing there and it just started to randomly touch me up.. I have never felt so ill in my life
Surreal I dreamt I was pregnant, and yet there was no father. I really didn’t want the kid but felt a bit bad about killing it (seriously this casual) and there was allsorts of things that were factors but the only one I can remember was that Mr S said that he hadn’t had a pregnancy in his form for a while. Odd but what’s new?
Realistic In London, someone pulls a gun on Clarkson and I take the bullet. The rest of this time I’m laying on the floor unsure of why the hell I did that and the three of them standing over me.
Funny Set in St Johns involving year 12, Mr Sand Dr P. Half the year are zombies, sort of a Shaun of the dead parody. Jenna has been bitten and we have a limited amount of time to download her thoughts before the zombie brain takes over and they are lost. I then walk into a classroom to help Dr P fight Katy Pigg, who is now a zombie. He is trying to attack her with scissors (really big scissors, about 30 cm from handle to point) he then sees I’m unarmed and passes them to be to fight her bare handed. She then pauses and demands four plates. He hands them to her. She throws them against a wall in an attempt to break them but fails as they are plastic. I laugh at her and so she picks them up and chases me down the corridor giving me ten seconds to escape before she throws them. I think I’m going to die, one hits me and I’m fine, because they’re plastic.
Surreal/Eerie In current school. Much eerier than yesterdays (see above). We have to decide on a theme for some weird centenary day. We decide “a world where god abandons us” and it’s all very dreary. We then defeat the devil as we decide against it (theme happens in reality, not just decorations). We then have a fancy dress party. I see Mr S standing by my locker. I look down then look up slowly, starting at his feet; the shoes are the same, as is the outfit, he;s wearing his pink stripy tie. When I look at his face it’s Dr P, he’s come dressed as Mr S for the party. I go as a detective. Pin stripe suit, black hat , toy pistol and a notebook.
Surreal Get a new car. Buggy sized. £35,000. Show it off to Dr Cox at a cocktail party. The car looks like a (computer) mouse shaped bugatti and it shrinks when you get out of it to the size of a mouse. It’s blue and black. New style. 120mph. 0-60 in 1.2s.